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Dear Max,
I’ve always felt a bit like an outsider in the mainstream gay scene. It seems centered around certain bars, clubs, and aesthetics that don’t really resonate with me.
I’m more introverted and my interests are a bit different – I’m into things like indie music, nature, and quieter social settings. I often feel like I don’t quite fit the ‘typical’ gay stereotype and it’s been hard to find my place.
Are there alternative LGBTQ+ communities or spaces where I might feel more at home? How can I connect with people who share my interests and sensibilities?
-Quiet in Ohio
Related: Gay Test – Am I Gay?
Dear Quiet in Ohio,
First off, it’s completely okay to feel out of step with the mainstream gay scene. Remember, the LGBTQ+ community is wonderfully diverse, and there’s no one-size-fits-all way to be gay. Your uniqueness is something to celebrate!
Now, to find your tribe, you might need to look beyond the usual hotspots. Many cities have LGBTQ+ groups focused on specific interests like hiking, book clubs, or music. Check out social media platforms, community bulletin boards, or LGBTQ+ resource centers for information about such groups.
If you’re into indie music, see if there are any LGBTQ+ friendly indie music venues or clubs in your area. These spaces often host events where you could meet like-minded individuals. For nature lovers, look for LGBTQ+ hiking or outdoor adventure groups. Not only do these groups offer a chance to enjoy your passion for nature, but they also provide a more relaxed setting for socializing.
Don’t underestimate online communities either. There are numerous forums and social media groups dedicated to specific interests within the LGBTQ+ community. This can be a great way to connect with others who share your hobbies and build friendships, even if they’re not in your immediate geographic area.
Lastly, consider starting your own group if you can’t find one that fits. You’d be surprised how many others might share your feelings of not fitting into the mainstream scene.
Remember, your identity and interests are unique to you, and there are others out there who will share and celebrate them with you. It might take a bit of searching, but the community you’re looking for is out there.
Good luck!
Related: Gay Test – Am I Gay?