Why It’s OK to Be Christian & Gay

Is homosexuality really a sin according to the Bible or is it OK to be Christian & gay?

Dear Max,

I think I’m gay but I am really worried because I am concerned that it may go against my faith to be homosexual.

I am Christian and my question is: Is homosexuality really a sin? I’ve asked different people and all the adults give me tons of Bible verses to look at.

I just want to know if it is or not because I don’t really understand the Bible and I’ve been fighting with this since I was 11 years old, and the pain is just too much.

And if it’s okay to be Christian & gay, is it okay to experiment with a guy to find my way?

I’m just stuck and I need your response if you could.


Related: 7 Awesome Ways to Celebrate Gay Pride

Dear Believer,

This is a very difficult question and there are probably as many answers as there are Christians on this planet.

It is true that there are verses in the Bible that speaks against homosexuality, or at least what can be interpreted as speaking against homosexuality.

There are also verses in the Bible that says you are not supposed to eat shellfish and tells you how much to charge for your slaves..

Christian & gay

When it comes down to it I think you have to decide what the main messages in your religion are.

Most Christians will tell you that the main messages in the Bible are to love your neighbor and to be good to other people.

Why not focus on those passages which are repeated again and again in the Bible instead on those few oddities that came out of a different time and a different culture?

Homosexuality is not a lifestyle or a choice like many fundamentalists want you to believe. God created you the way you are so how could it be a sin?

There are a lot of people that are both gay and Christians, and who have no problem with combining the two.

I suggest that you seek up one of the many gay or gay friendly congregations that are out there. They can help you find your way in life.

Also, take a look at the comments below. Some of them are really helpful (others not so much). The site QChristian is also great.

Good luck!

Related: I Don’t Like Being Gay


  1. As much as I want to agree with this response, I’ve got to disagree….I’m going through the same exact thing you are going through. I was raised as a Christian all my life, still attend church on Sundays, sing in a choir, not because I have to, but because I want to. Everyday I wake up thinking “why me?,” and yet, the Bible says that God doesn’t give a person more than he can handle, which is what leads me to velieve that this is a test. Everything in life is a choice, and we all must accept the consequences of the choices we make. Throughout the Bible there are verses that can be interpreted as homosexuality being a sin, because it is…we are homosexual, bisexual, transgender because we want to be, not because we have to be…and why? because we are acting on indulgences, temptations, etc. that allow us to act on these thoughts without worrying about the consequences. For the author who replied to Believer’s question, you can’t pick and choose which passages in the Bible you want to follow and which you don’t…it doesn’t work that way. I do agree that the message is different for each of us and that we all interpret this message in our own way, but to be judgmental in a sense that impacts your faith defeats the purpose of your faith doesn’t it? Like saying when things are good, you don’t need to pray to God, but in times of need you should always pray…

    Believer, you’ve got to answer this question yourself. What does your conviction say? What are your morals and values in life? Do you believe that you are here for a reason? Trust in God, or don’t, but you can’t have it both ways. It’s difficult and it’s depressing and just not fair, but if you put your trust in God, who can be against you…seek first the Kingdom of God. Ask Him to guide you. We are all being deceived that to be accepting of these new ideologies is ok, but if you think about it, they are the purest forms of sin that one can commit. You’re in my thoughts and prayers…

    • You say “you can’t pick and choose which passages in the Bible you want to follow” but we still know that happens all the time. There are plenty of passages in the Bible that people no longer follow because they are outdated. People eat shellfish, they wear different fabrics, they don’t kill their slaves…

      • Ok, first of all, you just called The Bible outdated… I’ll leave it at that.

        Second, there’s a difference between knowingly picking and choosing passages to follow and misunderstanding and misinterpreting it’s overall message: intent. You say that people have chosen to ignore outdated passages, which is true, but there are people who still incorporate these outdated passages in their everyday lives. Seventh Day Adventists don’t eat pork, and some even go vegan because they chose to live by those passages. As far as wearing different fabrics and killing slaves, I think you may have misinterpreted a passag…please provide a reference.

    • You could also say that god made you who you are.. he didn’t single you out, so long as love is involved i’m sure he’d have no problem over gender considering the mass scale of murders/massacres that are commited .. on the other hand how many christians break one of the ten commandments on a daily basis?? i think you’ll find that the number is so great you’d be better off counting who didn’t break one as the number i’m sure would be so much smaller.. Man isn’t perfect, he/we wasn’t born perfect, he’s born as god intended him to be.. if that involves being gay then so be it and as far as the bible is concerned it says “love thy neighbour”, what if your neighbour is a single man??.. it’s all down to interpretation, the bible can be read misread over a thousand times with each person forming a different meaning over the same passage of scripture..SO, if god had a hand in making your parents meet and decided to bless them a child to love and to cherish then if the child is “flawed” then it’s in gods plan for him to be “flawed” and if people have difficulty coming to terms with being gay just remember, god loves us all, and god forgives us our sins so live your life as you see fit, after all god gave you life to live it to the fullest in love, happiness and in peace.. not to fret over whether you can love the person you do.. he see’s all, he hears all and he made all and accordingly will forgive all.. gays included.. nuff said xXx

      • Paul –I appreciate all that you wrote because I say the exact thing that you said here. I am an older gay man 84 yrs old. I am a Christian that is saved ( justified ) By Grace through Faith and not of myself at all. God loves us all and gave His Begotten Son Jesus that he sent to mankind in the flesh to fulfill the law by paying the ransom so that our sins are forgiven and our penalty is paid by Him out of Love for us so that our sins will be washed away. The earthy body that we have in the flesh will always sin. But in our minds and heart, we who have confessed that it is our faith only by Grace we are saved . Then we will have The Spirit Of God living in our Spirit and Soul. The sins are of the flesh and not in our Spirit and soul.
        The old Hymn –“Just as I am without one plea, I come ” is correct. We do not have to plead for God to save us, we know he wants to because why else would He send His Son to us to pay the penalty of Death for us. With the Holy Spirit now in us, the Spirit will lead us. There are many Gays who love and have accepted By faith the Grace of God and still are gay because God accepts Gays. He may use us in ways that is good for helping others to learn and accept the Truth as it Is the Truth about God that sets us free.

  2. Seriously??? If it was a sin then why did he make men so hot and sexually desirable to men like me?? I wasn’t born with the devil in me or with some mental disorder. I was born Gay and I am Proud to be!! 🙂

    • I’m not saying to not be proud. I’m saying everything in life is a choice. Whether or not you choose to succumb to the sexually desires and temptations is up to you. And we weren’t born with the devil in us, but we are born to this world in sin…There’s a difference.

      • It may be a choice like everything is and we all should know that. I mean a choice about things we control such as our brains and our actions. I say it is OK to make it Ok to be Gay. It’s like a choice to have coffee with cream or just black. Things like that that is how I see being gay or not.The desires that we have been there in some way and if it is one that is consensual and alway not hurting anyone it is Ok but I made a choice To lie about being non-gay when I knew I was gay by preferences. Years ago that was a choice to lie when I did not want to lie as it is worse than being gay and. lying about it. The New Testament mentions a liar is an abomination more than it ever says that about being a homosexual. Being a homosexual is a condition and can be Ok if loving your neighbor as yourself is how we live. which is being truthful

  3. This argument has been going on for far to long if these so called christians were christians then they would or should be acting like christians and excepting everyone for who they are I was under the impression that if there is a god then he or she (who said it has to be a man ) that he or she would except everyone no matter if they be homosexual, black or white or what ever, long gone are the days where the church were the lord and masters of what we could say or do the only sin I recognise is murder which I have to point out the church has been guilty of in the past lets take the case of when the church murdered innocent men women and children because they did not conform to thier beliefs anyone remember the inquisition.

  4. Believer, at the end of the day being a Christian is about your personal relationship with God and Jesus Christ and anything that keeps you from that relationship is a sin. This can be anything from eating cookies to killing someone. To put this in the simplest of examples, after Adam and Eve sinned it was they who pulled away from God, not the other way around. This is the purpose of sin, to separate you from God’s love. Being gay can’t ever do that. Being gay doesn’t make you a mistake and it is definitely not a part of yourself ypu need to feel ashamed of. What a lot of Christians don’t understand is that there is a major difference between being gay and being sexually immoral. I can give you countless examples and in depth explanations of why you should never feel that you can’t be your true self in the presence of God but I’ll need an entire sermon for that. Lastly I just want to tell you that I prayed to God for a specific husband, being Godly was part of that request, and now 2 years later we’re getting engaged. We attend church every sunday, we pray together and we have Bible study. God would not have answered my prayer if he was against it. Some people choose to use their homosexuality to enforce Biblical condemnation on their lives but rather leave that to accuser. I prefer to use my homosexuality as an example of God’s amazing grace that even a sinner like me can be welcomed into the Kingdom. We gays are to Christians what christians were to Jews back in the day. The point is that I know as an active gay Christian man, I’m saved, I have a strong relationship with Jesus (literally tell him everything) and I’m definitely going to spend eternity with my heavenly Father. I just hope that you realise the same counts for ypu and that you choose God’s grace above the devil” accusations.

    • This is an amazing reply an amazing blessing. I have spoken to and just about to meet my boyfriend. He has attributes that I can gain from and I believe I have vice-versa. We talk everyday. We are both Christians although my faith was challenged before coming out. Now I do feel closer to God than ever before and have real hope to grow within His grace and love. This has transitioned from text book stuff to having meaning within my soul. I can only apologise for the years of self loathing and trying to turn my back upon Jesus through my denial of His creation within me – not nice. So am I born again – it seems I have started to live such a more positive life now, and people have noticed too. True gay love cannot separate us from God but we can by denying our creation and not acknowledging God’s love for us. God does not make mistakes – we are not freaks but maybe instead hybrids encompassing hopefully some of the positivity of both male and female characteristics. I do hope to grow in my faith and would like it if both myself and my boyfriend could follow Jesus’ teaching.

      I know people have been praying for my future happiness and different people have been praying for my boyfriend’s too. So are we an answer to all the prayers. Why would He want two lonely people not fully being all we are designed to be when those people can love, care and support one another within God’s love.

      God Bless

  5. In the words of the oppressed Quentin Crisp, (amongst many many more gay men down the years) …. ‘I am homosexual and I want everyone to know’. It is hilarious to think that a so called ‘ loving religion’ can turn nasty when it comes to a person’s sexuality. Indeed, homosexuality has been with us for as long as there have been human beings on planet Earth. The bible and all it’s crap can go whistle!

  6. The prohibitions against same sex relationships are all found in the old testament whose laws and customs Jesus told us no longer applied. Jesus makes no comment on the subject and neither do any of the apostles.

  7. No, being gay or homosexual is not a sin, not as a human being and not as someone who has a faith!
    The religious books are written by human beings, not by the creator!
    Human beigns have written their ideas, their thoughts and their principles down, and all those who wrote something down was doing so out of his/her own interpretation of what he/she thought to be right, at that time and moment!
    What would you yourself write down, as guide to people who are with a faith and homosexual?
    Think about what is written, about for instance Jesus said, did and practiced!
    He said that people should love eachother the way they are, care for eachother, accept eachother!
    Who are those in the year 2017 to speak other words then Jeus spoke?
    Jesus included everyone, none excluded, in 2017 people who claim to be speaking on behalf fo Jesus, and even on behalf of God, that certain people must be excluded, must be thrown out of congregations becasue they have a different way of loving other people then these self-proclaimed clerics say…. That logic?
    When you are a Christian, you know that God created you, in the way God wanted you to be!
    Not in the way those self-proclaimed clerics say a human being must be, no God Himself created you the way He decided you to be excisting, he determined for you who to love, how to love and even when to love!
    No human being has the right to determine for another human to decide how that other human being is be, who that other being must love, and not how that other human being is to love another human being!
    When you are Christian you follow what is God telling YOU, what YOU feel God is letting YOU feel and know what is good, my advice (if any) is to follow your guts, a persons’gut-feeling 90% of the time tells someone what to do, instinctively (sp) some call, others refer to it as God’s input……
    And no, regardless of what other human beings say, homosexuality is NOT a sin, it is YOUR life to lead, and YOUR existence!

  8. No I do not believe that homosexuality is a sin. Most Christians would argue that it is a sin because it is unnatural and the sex is not meant for procreation, that you cannot have children as the bible instructs. But in a world that is faced by problems of overpopulation, procreation is not ideal as it would lead to more suffering. Homosexuality encouraged adoption which helps a lot of orphans and gives them a better chance of a good life. Totally disregarding the Bible, my argument is that God wants us to be happy as long as our happiness does not go against other people’s free will and does not directly cause suffering, I see no problem with being gay and I do not think that God would punish us for it.

  9. Believer-
    if you are Christian, then you must believe that the bible is the inspired word of God, which means one can’t ala carte the bible. Either a Christian believes all the bible or none of it. To be a Christian means you are under a new covenant with Christ because of what He did on that cross for your sins as well as for everyone else. To be a Christian one must accept verbally what he did on the cross, believe he is God that came to this planet as a man and subsequently died for your sins. This is what makes one Christian different from others. There are sins out there that people commit according to the bible. Homosexuality is only one of many. Sex outside of marriage comes to mind, whether one is gay or straight. and there are tons of others. Sounds like to me you are seeking and that’s the Lord ‘talking’ to you. Go to a good bible teaching church that’s filled with love. This is what you need. When you go there, talk to someone about this, because, of all the people out there, these people would be genuinely understanding about your dilemma. Take care and God speed buddy.

  10. Believer,
    First I want to tell you that I struggled with this from the time I was five years old until I was 19. I have included a link to my blog on HIV where I share my story of coming to terms with who I am in Christ Jesus {http://fightingbackagainsthiv.blogspot.com/2011/03/love-and-understanding.html}. I was brought up in a Pentecostal environment, having been anointed with oil, “demons” cast out of me, you name it, I have been through it. I cried myself to sleep every night praying in the Spirit and BEGGING GOD to make me a “NORMAL” boy. I still thank GOD everyday that along my journey God spoke to me through a prophet that came to our church, then 20 years later confirming what I had gone through through a little old lady at a food pantry who had just met me for the first time. God LOVES you just as HE created you and HE will give you the PEACE to be who HE created you to be if you just surrender to HIM and quit letting the NEGATIVITY from the PULPIT keep you battling in CONDEMNATION. Jesus came to save the WORLD NOT CONDEMN. I will be praying for your Peace. Blessings and Peace, Rainbow Pastor David – Spreading the GOOD NEWS of the GOSPEL of JESUS CHRIST to ALL GOD’S CREATION.

  11. Gary,

    I love your explanations; as the entire reading was “spot on” (example: “if you are Christian, then you must believe that the bible is the inspired word of God, which means one can’t ala carte the bible. Either a Christian believes all the bible or none of it. To be a Christian means you are under a new covenant with Christ…”). BEAUTIFULLY STATED & FACTUAL!

    When following the true meaning of the bible; one must incorporate the ENTIRE bible (both Old & New Testaments) from cover to cover and be able to understand & incorporate the meaning of such. Is it difficult? Not really; but one must read with an open mind and for clarity. We have ALL sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (I know that I had done my share and continue to engage; knowing that it is wrong and hoping that one day I will return to serving Christ). Yes; homosexuality IS a sin but I definitely am not here to pass judgment; as one has recently been struggling in that arena (there is no such thing thing as a homo ‘gene’; for as difficult as it seems, such is a choice). I know the road that I should be on (following Christ); but I am so disillusioned at this time (as the last 20 years has been extremely difficult and fatiguing; that I am engaging in activity that I know is not biblical)l. I only hope for the best because I am definitely almost ready to “throw in” the towel (but my stubbornness will not allow me to do such…LOL). All of us posting here need to do the best that we can with what we have to work with. It is also my hope that all of us follow our hearts as we discover our true selves; in the search for happiness (or at lease contentment; especially on an emotional basis). Good luck to everyone here!

  12. Rainbow Pastor David here and I wanted to take a moment to share my unique experience with coming to terms with being who God created me to be. For all those wrestling with what you have been told by the church and what you feel inside, I encourage you to go the my blog link and learn what God has taught me. I think it is so sad that the church as a whole has taken the Word of God out of context and created their own hate verses against the LGBTQ Community. I went to seminary and I studied the original Hebrew and Greek and I know the truth. We were actually told in seminary NOT to teach the TRUTH because we would only confuse the people because they had been taught a certain way for so many years. I will NEVER NOT tell the TRUTH as a man of God. The so called “Clobber Passages” are taken from the lessons against Temple Prostitution and Worship, NOT about homosexual relationships. You may also want to visit one of the sites that goes into great detail about the Romans Sexual Practices and the Bible here: http://www.gaychristian101.com/. Thank you b-gay.com for allowing people to learn the TRUTH, that GOD loves them just as HE created them to be. Blessings and Peace, Rainbow Pastor David

  13. I believe that loving someone of the same sex and enjoying physical contact in a loving way is NOT sinful. I think that the old testament bible was written by man interrupted by man is really NOT what god intended. I think we should love. It is not sinful to love. It seems that we want to label people as Heterosexual or Homosexual. I say we are all human beings capable of loving and should love whomever our heart tells us to love.

  14. You are what you are and you were made in God’s image and God does not make junk. And I have to disagree with “Going through the same problem”. You are not gay because you “want to be” – you are gay because you are gay. I will not argue scripture because as one can tell there are a hundred different interpretations for every passage depending on where you are coming from. You need to sit back, relax and learn who you really are and you will find that being gay can also be a blessing-and God says, “Yes!” The Bible is a road map to the truth and your truth is different from my truth even though we are gay. Once you reconcile the scriptures issue you will find great peace of mind and will know that “Love Is Love!” whether it is sought with the opposite sex or the same sex.

  15. I am a Christian who fought against my homosexuality for decades. I was taught I wasn’t suppose to feel that way so I suppressed it. That is until I found this book, “Making Sense of the Bible” by Adam Hamilton; one of today’s leading theologians in the Methodist church. I hope if you read it you will find the same freedom I found in my spiritual life and eventually the kind of true love I found in the man I have met and am now in a committed relationship with.

  16. I felt honored to read all the information above including the comments…And as a Unisexual I think that in God’s Eyes love and Respect is all about.You be who you are and they will be they are. So If you think it’s against the bible so apply it to yourself and stop mindling on other’s life.

  17. God made two different types of genders. He made Adam and Eve, Eve from Adam. I don’t like this but being homosexual is against nature. What is natural is a man and woman. It mentioned later on that those who practice homosexuality, sorcery and other unnatural things would never receive the kingdom of God. The bible doesn’t say that you can’t have feelings toward someone in the same sex, you just can’t act on it. But if you want…I think I found a loop whole. You could ask the person if they are willing to abide by certain rules and then you could live together as brothers. But it is a sin against God and utterly your religion if you choose to act on this. I personally am not against it and I am also having feelings for someone in the same sex, but there has to be a harsh line between yourself and your “boyfriend.” God made everything in Nature. He made everything perfect, healthy, and good. The fallen angle known as Kalona(from the Cherokee tribe) creates sin from the very first sin through Adam and Eve. I’m sorry but you have to choose between the things of this world and the World of God. God himself even said that. I’m sorry but you must make a choice. God says to come as you are yes, but he also says that if you choose to accept Christ then you need to be in this world but without being a part of this world. This is crap, this is frustrating. But you can’t be both gay and Christian. “Christian” means to be “Christ like” that should mean that you strive for perfection. All of these are great arguments but there are verses that clearly discriminate against homosexuality. Romans 1, 1 Corinthians 6, Colossians 3(focusing on verse 5-6) as much as I don’t like it…God doesn’t like homosexuality. The only way it would be good(never) would be if you were already in a gay marriage when you became christian. Yes if you are a christian than you accept God but you also need to admit you are wrong in life and you NEED him. You can’t say that you are if you won’t. Being gay is not natural. There is a reason guys and girls can’t get pregnant from the same sex partner. If you really want to be christian and gay then the best way would be to become brothers and don’t have sex or anything. Kissing(very lightly) is fine along with hugs/cuddling and maybe even holding hands. But sex…no, I’m sorry

    • Does that mean that in the beginning Adam was a hermaphrodite? Man and woman? And why did God make Eve out of Adam? Was he out of building materials so he couldn’t make her from scratch? Or is it just an image of women being inferior to men? Intersex people are born with sex characteristics (including genitals, gonads and chromosome patterns) that do not fit typical binary notions of male or female bodies. Were they not created by God? Also, homosexuality exists in countless animal species. Nothing unnatural about it.

  18. Oh boy – have I struggled with this one -denying my gayness for 38 years – until just recently coming out – I feel so much more alive now and feel closer to God too I am a Christian too – although I used my rejection of myself to try and reject Jesus’ love too so know something of the deep pain this causes – that really was a lonely life. I know I need to be loved and to love another man. I cannot understand how the God of love is supposed to reject true love. It says in the Bible men were having unnatural sex with each other but I realise that to a gay man gay sex IS natural. So to a hetero gay sex is not natural so is wrong ? The reformation Project with Matthew Vines, Lee (sorry cannot remember his Christian name) and Kathy Baldock debunk the prejudice and mis interpreted meaning of St, Paul’s inclusive message of love. What did Jesus say about gay love – nothing. The Bible does not relate to true loving, caring gay relationships but talks of abusive behaviours.

    I have come to realise that my sin was not in accepting how wonderfully made by God I was, how wonderfully balanced in the malakoi and softer side of live including caring. I find it almost addictive to care and it has been said to me that sometimes when a guy is this caring he can be gay. I would love a truly, loving supportive relationship with a guy – it is not good for a guy to be on his own. It is only now I am starting to discuss with a boyfriend and this seems to be so right. I do believe and trust God will bless my gay relationship if is the right guy. He has witnessed my loneliness and the hurt it has caused me to not be true to myself.
    i am trying to get it right – sex is not the first point of call but the last – a true in depth discovery of our inner beings I feel comes first – no I don’t mean anal ! That’s lowered the tone – sorry. I have an amazingly affirming Vicar and others too. they seem to say we know how much you have hurt and you will help make someone happy one day. Care them to death ! Seriously though if two people are enhance each others lives – I think Jesus blesses that – to not enjoy others love between themselves surely is unbiblical ?