My Guilt Over Cheating Is Ripping Me Apart

Why you need to get over the guilt of cheating on your boyfriend

Dear Max,

I made a major mistake, and now I can’t live with what I have done.

I have been with my boyfriend for three years, and he had been the only guy I had been involved with. He was my first lover.

For the lack of better judgment, I cheated on him with a acquaintance of both of ours. I could say it was due to use of alcohol, but that would be a lie. The opportunity just presented itself, and I took it.

Immediately after, the guilt set in about what I did, so I came clean and told my boyfriend about the affair. If anything, I can say I am honest to a fault.

I was sure would end our relationship. But to my surprise, he was very understanding. Too understanding in my opinion.

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He told me that he can understand why I had cheated, being the fact that I had never been with anyone else but him and we should just put in the past.

But it’s all I think about. Not the act of having the affair, but the fact that I went through with it. That I cheated on someone I care so much about.

I love my boyfriend, and I never meant to cause him any harm.

Things seem to be okay between us, all for the fact that I feel this unbearable guilt for what I have done. I don’t want to lose him, but I am the one who can’t get pass what I did.

Will I ever get over this, or am I just doomed to feel the guilt for a night of passion that should have never occurred?

–Big time douche

Dear Big time douche,
Enough is enough. You did it, he forgave you…time to move on with your life togeather!

Don’t live in the past. Mistakes are made so people can learn from them. You have learned from your mistake. Now you need to keep your man and your relationship.

If you continue like you do now you risk losing your boyfriend and make life miserable for both of you just because you can’t stop wallowing in self-pity.

Do you understand how selfish that is?

You owe it to your boyfriend to forgive yourself and to focus positive energy into your relationship. If you do, wonderful things can come out of it.

It is not going to happen over night – and it will take a lot of work – but you will come out stronger on the other side.

Good luck!

Related: How to Be a Better Boyfriend to Your Man