How to Tell If He’s Gay

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How to tell if a guy is gay? – Here are some signs that may show if he is playing for our team

What do you do if you meet this really hot dude and need to find out if he is gay so you can make a move on him? Well, you could just ask him of course, but life isn’t always that simple. He may be a friend you are afraid of losing, or you could just be afraid. Period. So here are some good – although admittedly stereotypical – advice on how to tell if a guy is gay.

His relationships

Has he had any previous relationships? With this we mean real, confirmable relationships and not some fuzzy stories about all the super-hot women he was sleeping with on his last trip to Cancun. Where he just happened to travel all alone without any friends to confirm his conquests…

Certainly he may just be a shy person having problems hooking up with the opposite sex. But chances are also that he is more interested in guys than in women and that he just haven’t dared to admit it to himself yet. You may just be the one he has been waiting for helping him getting out his shell/closet.

Related: 7 Signs That He Really Likes You

His wandering eyes

When you are hanging out with your friend, does he light up every time a pretty girl passes by? Single straight guys quickly loses interest in you if they see an opportunity for flirting with a woman.

And if his wandering eyes tend to follow other guys instead of women, then there is no doubt. Unfortunately for you though, that also probably means he’s not that into you

His compliments

Does your crush notice every time you have a new haircut or compliment you on those really cool new jeans you just bought? Either he is a flaming metrosexual or chances are that he is in fact gay. Straight men usually just aren’t that interested in your appearance and rarely notices those cute little outfits you are wearing.

And if he compliments your girlfriend on her new Prada-boots, move forward with confidence (right, Elle Woods?) There is no way a straight man knows his way around women’s shoe brands, maybe unless he’s just been doing inventory during a very expensive divorce settlement.

How to Tell If He's Gay

His idols

Many gay men adore people – and especially women – with strong and bigger-than-life personalities. People that dare to be different and who are not afraid of being judged by others are often admired.

So if your love interest suddenly bursts out with “No more wire hangers!” or starts humming “It’s raining men,” he may definitely be playing for our team. A lot of Madonna, Britney and Miley tunes on his iPod is not a bad indication either.

And that is how to tell if a guy is gay. Or, at least they can be some signs of being gay. But, of course, you may really never know unless you actually ask him.

Related: Gay Test – Am I Gay?

A Relationship of Convenience

Is a relationship of convenience without love or respect really worth it?

Dear Max,
I am 25. I have been in a relationship with a man for 3 years and he is now 51. Our relationship is hard and very difficult.

We don’t communicate very well, sex is almost non-existent, and I feel too often as if I am a possession. He is not my sugar daddy, he has never paid a bill of mine. I am a full time student, I work full time and I am a member of the Nat’l guard.

I always hoped when I left my wife to pursue this relationship that his and mine would be similar to my wife’s and mine. Laughing, spending time together, long talks, similar interests, and two people working towards one goal.

But I was mistaken. We seem to only be roommates in a home owned by his ex-boyfriend who doesn’t want any of us to make any one aware that any of us are gay.

I don’t know what exactly I am asking, I just thought you would have some advice on the subject. I think I feel it’s a relationship of convenience right now not of love or respect.

–Confused

Related: Waiting for Him to Love You

Dear Confused,
it seems to me that you already know what to do. I don’t have anything against dating older people, but 30 years difference it is quite a big difference. Even though the age difference is not affecting you, seems to me that it could be a factor in your relationship.

You are right when you say it is a relationship of convenience. Relationships are supposed to be fun like you said. You are supposed to laugh together, have similar interests and work towards one goal. You know that and you know there is someone there waiting for you.

So do me a favor… stop wasting your time and wasting your boyfriend’s time and talk about your relationship with him. Tell him how you feel. Work something out with him to either fix it or break up and remain friends.

Like I always tell people, you only live once. Why not be happy?

Related: How to Kick-Start Your New Life

Fort Lauderdale and Wilton Manors

The Gay Venice of America is a vibrant and exciting gay destination year-round.

Fort Lauderdale, which has transformed itself into Florida’s leading gay vacation destination over the past couple of decades, continues to turn heads with the spectacular redevelopment of its stunning beachfront. This neighborhood with a number of gay resorts has seen the opening of several upscale, gay-friendly hotels, including the Atlantic, the Ritz-Carlton, and the W Hotel.

New bars, restaurants, and attractions also continue to open throughout the city and in the neighboring community of Wilton Manors, helping to make the region a vibrant and exciting gay destination year-round.

In deciding where to stay in Fort Lauderdale, consider whether you’d prefer a gay, clothing-optional resort or a larger mainstream property. Among the latter is the charming Riverside Hotel, set along fashionable Las Olas Boulevard. This natty 1936 property recently completed a stunning, multimillion-dollar makeover. The dashing Atlantic offers unobstructed ocean views from the majority of its spacious, airy rooms, all of them with Bose CD-stereos, lovely patios, and small kitchens.

The Ritz-Carlton is even more sumptuous: Most rooms overlook the ocean or Intracoastal Waterway, and they come with such deluxe perks as butler service, a fabulous spa, and leather furniture. The W Hotel Fort Lauderdale offer panoramic views of both the city and the ocean, all while you enjoy a swim in the rooftop pool.

Among the gay resorts, the upscale property that spearheaded Fort Lauderdale’s growth into a major gay destination is the Royal Palms, and it continues to shine as one of the nation’s premier small gay hotels. Perks here include complimentary snacks, wine, and beer, CD players and VCRs in many units, glass-brick showers with high-end bath amenities, and dedicated top-notch service. Guests can relax all day around the stunning pool with a waterfall and fiber-optic lighting. There are several other fine upscale resorts of comparable repute, including Pineapple Point, a handsome 1930s spread that has the grace and style of a Caribbean plantation.

The more reasonably priced Elysium Resort, just 200 yards from the beach, has perfectly comfortable rooms. Here you’ll always find friendly guys lounging on the expansive sundeck, with its hot tub, hammock, and tropical bar – there are two heated pools. Even the simplest rooms at nearby Villa Venice are warm and attractive, with refrigerators and microwaves. With its friendly staff and an extensive pool area where breakfast is served, the resort draws an energetic, fun-in-the-sun bunch.

The Worthington Inn
The Worthington Guest House

The similarly priced Worthington Guest House ranks among the cruisier resorts in town, with a playful vibe and attractive grounds for sunning and swimming au naturale. The same owners opened the neighboring Alcazar Resort, also featuring a frisky ambience and lovely rooms.

The Grand Resort, whose urbane decorative scheme contrasts markedly with the tropical beachy ambience of Fort Lauderdale beach; is one of the few gay lodgings with a gym. With about 30 rooms, the Schubert Resort, fashioned out of a retro-cool 1950s hotel compound, affords a similar level of opulence and alluring facilities, including a cafe with a full bar.

Although it’s set a short drive inland from the beach, the Coral Reef Guest House is a worthwhile option thanks to its attractive gardens, massage offerings, and eight cheerfully furnished, reasonably priced rooms. One of the closest resorts to the many gay bars and restaurants in Wilton Manors, Cabanas Guest House appeals to social butterflies, with its 10-man Jacuzzi and eight-man aromatherapy steam room. The posh rooms have goose-down comforters, Wi-Fi, and CD/MP3 players.

Fort Lauderdale is less about sightseeing than Miami or Orlando – people come here to relax in the sun, socialize, and shop. This latter activity you can enjoy at the famed Sawgrass Mills Mall, whose more than 300 designer outlets include Donna Karan, Saks, Ann Taylor, and Macy’s. Or just stroll along Las Olas, which abounds with fashion boutiques and jewelry shops.

It’s also a city built on and around water, and there are myriad opportunities for sightseeing cruises, fishing charters, sailing trips, scuba-diving excursions, and kayak tours – many of the local accommodations work closely with area boating and sailing outfitters. But if you do have a hankering for a bit of culture, catch a play or concert at the Broward Center for the Performing Arts. The Museum of Art Fort Lauderdale is also a great place to while away the occasional rainy afternoon. It’s known for its first-rate collection of works by leading American impressionist painter William Glackens.

The city’s dining scene continues to evolve. At Johnny V, a hip Las Olas restaurant helmed by celeb chef Johnny Vinczencz – you might try ancho-cinnamon-grilled pork tenderloin or corn-dusted yellowtail snapper with smoked-pepper relish.

Or consider one of Fort Lauderdale’s several gay faves, such as Kitchenetta Trattoria, who serves some of the best Italian food in the region, including knockout ricotta cheesecake for dessert. A favorite piano cabaret in Wilton Manors, Tropics offers above-average Continental fare, such as a prosciutto-pocket starter – a pastry stuffed with prosciutto, apples, walnuts, and mozzarella.

Wilton Manors is also home to Rosie’s, a former Hamburger Mary’s restaurant that’s still a convivial spot for casual pub fare and socializing, and Galanga, known for its outstanding sushi and well-prepared Thai food. For dessert, coffee, and wine, or delicious sandwiches during the day, be sure to stop by breezy and hip Stork’s Bakery. The Naked Grape is a handsome little wine bar with light food and live music most nights as well as a nice selection of microbrew beers to go along with the vino.

Fort Lauderdale / Wilton Manors pulses with gay bars. Georgie’s Alibi is somewhat of a local landmark and is popular almost every night of the week. The Manor is modeled after The Abbey in West Hollywood, and the huge space is crowded on weekend nights.

Leather bars like the dungeonesque Ramrod, with its Tom of Finland artwork, always draw big crowds. Scandals Saloon is a country bar with live performances, dancing & sing-a-longs. Cubby Hole is a neighborhood bar for bear lovers, while Hunter’s are a slick, happening video bar. There’s something for everybody in this constantly growing gay resort community.

5 Steps to Scoring the Hottest Guy You Know

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And the reason why your looks may be less important than you think

We’ve all been there. Well, at least I have. Many times. I’ve met an absolutely amazing guy and have given up before even really having tried to hook up with him.

The crazy part is that he may have liked me even more than I liked him. He may have wanted to make pretty little puppies with me, but I never gave him a chance because I lacked the confidence.

So what are you to do? Here are some advice on how you can score the hottest guy you know.

Related: Five Big Dating Don’ts

Visualize your hotness

When you stand in front of the mirror you are likely to see every little flaw that you have. It’s important that you understand that most of the time you are your own worst critic.

Nobody else, unless you have an amazing self confidence, actually see you that way. They see you more like you do in that fuzzy, yellow tinted, bad-lit mirror in the club after a couple of beers.

Before approaching your dream guy, visualize yourself as the hottest guy you have ever seen yourself. I guarantee you, he will see you the same way too.

Mimic your idol, but with your own twist

Who is your idol? Who would you like to look like, and who would you like to be like? You may not be able to copy his look – and you really shouldn’t – but you could copy his style. But make your own twist on it or you will just end up as a badly made clone.

There is nothing wrong with having idols. However, remember that no idols are perfect and that the only reason why they seem so perfect is because you see them in a distance. If you got to see them up close, you would see their flaws in all their glory.

Hottest guy - Stephen Amell

Promote your uniqueness

You may like clones in the bars and on the Internet, but trust me, in the long run you want someone who is unique. And that goes for your future partner too.

If you just want him for a night of hot, dirty fun, that’s totally ok and you can disregard this advice. But if you’re looking for something more then you need to go the extra mile.

You may think that you should try to hide your weirdness in order to score this guy. No, absolutely not. That’s actually the worst thing you could do.

Your weirdness is what makes you unique and what separates you from everyone else. Embrace it and promote it like it’s no tomorrow.

Find common ground

Ok, you’re unique. And, if you followed my prior advice, he’s unique too. So we’re all good, right?

Well, we’ve established that uniqueness is good, but you kind of need to have something to connect you guys together too.

It’s not that hard, really. Just make a mental note of his likes and dislikes. It’s very rare that you cannot find anything to hook on to, and if that should be the case, you’re probably a horribel match and you should move on anyway.

Keep your own life, but compromise

So you have finally met the man of your dreams and you spend every waking hour thinking about him. You think about how to please him and make his life easier all the time.

Wake up, honey! Do you really think a hot guy worth having would want a total pushover? Never lose your own identity to anyone, and if he tries to take it away from you, you should be running like crazy. Remember, love is worth dying for, but it’s defenitely not worth living a horrible life for.

That being said, don’t expect him to give up his life for you either. Don’t sweat the small stuff, keep your integrity and find some common ground to build your life on together.

Follow these pointers and you will have a good chance of hooking up with the man of your dreams.

Exploring Vancouver

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Emerging as one of the most wonderful gay destinations in the world

In Vancouver, one of the world’s most stunning cities, you can kayak in English Bay in the morning before skiing down Grouse Mountain later that afternoon – indeed, few cities offer better access to the great outdoors. The city’s glimmering, postmodern city center anchors a peninsula jutting into the rippling Strait of Georgia, its shoreline sculpted by bays and inlets.

From just about anywhere on this peninsula, you’re within walking distance of two beaches, leafy Stanley Park, the ultra-gay Davie Village district, and several similarly diverting neighborhoods. It’s for all these reasons that Vancouver – which is also in a country that has legalized same-sex marriage – has emerged as one of the most wonderful gay destinations in the world.

Related: Exploring Victoria

For Americans, visiting Vancouver is quite easy. The city is just a three-hour drive north of Seattle, and it also has direct flights from numerous U.S. cities. Just keep in mind that you are required to show a valid passport when crossing the border.

Vancouver is a highly progressive place – feminists, lesbians, and gays play a prominent role in local politics, have helped rejuvenate several flagging neighborhoods, and support a compact but potent restaurant and club scene. The West End, which abuts Downtown and was a prostitution-ridden eyesore in the 1980s, is the city’s main gay commercial and residential sector.

You’ll find most of the gay nightlife and social scene along a roughly eight-block stretch of Davie Street known as Davie Village. Farther north, Davie intersects with another lively strip of cool shops and restaurants, Denman Street. At this intersection, you’re just steps from sparkling English Bay Beach, a fine spot to catch a few rays on a warm afternoon.

Davie Village is a terrific neighborhood for eating and bar-hopping. The campy and affordable Cafe Luxy serves humongous portions of pasta, and nearby Hamburger Mary’s is a fun, late-night bet for burgers, fries, and diner fare.

Elbow Room specializes in breakfasts and lunches, and “abusing” customers, including many celebrities from Canada & the U.S. Grab an espresso at gay-popular Delany’s or at Melriches, which is just around the corner from the acclaimed queer book and gift shop, Little Sisters.

Later in the evening, check out Davie Street’s gay bars, the most popular being Celebrities and The Junction Public House, which both draw young, stylish crowds. Both spots pull their share of lesbians, but Celebrities is the more diverse of the two.

Other fun drinking spots along Davie include Oasis (an attractively decorated piano cabaret and restaurant), Pumpjack (a neighborhood pub with a leather-and-Levi’s vibe), 1181 (an ultra-chichi martini lounge drawing a well-coiffed crowd), Fountainhead Pub (a fun sports bar with a great patio), and Numbers (a lovably dive-y cruise bar with three levels).

If you’re looking for action, drop by one of the city’s popular bathhouses, F212 Steam or Steamworks.

There are several gay-friendly bed-and-breakfasts and hotels in the neighborhood, the upscale West End Guest House being among the best, with its beautifully decorated Edwardian rooms. Another luxurious B&B that’s highly appealing is O’Canada House, whose rooms have spacious tile baths and TVs with VCRs.

You’ll find 195 spacious, contemporary suites with full kitchens and moderate rates at the Sandman Suites, a popular full-service hotel right in the heart of Davie Village – amenities include the popular Moxie’s Grill restaurant, a spa, and a fitness center.

Just steps from the West End you’ll discover the beautiful, rugged Stanley Park, which occupies a peninsula of more than 1,000 unspoiled acres of lush greenery, forests of cedar and Douglas fir, sandy beaches, and panoramic maritime vistas.

From here it’s a short drive to North Vancouver, home to Grouse Mountain ski area. For a great photo-op, stop by the nearby 450-foot-long Capilano Suspension Bridge, which swings gently (for the most part) 230 feet above the river below it.

Back in the city center, you’ll find some of the city’s best upscale shopping along Robson Street, and you can enjoy a more historic aspect of Vancouver by wandering through Gastown, the site of Canada’s transcontinental railroad terminus.

The neighborhood boomed throughout the late 1800s, foundered by the middle of this century, and became a model for urban restoration in the ’60s and ’70s. Today you can stroll along Gastown’s main cobbled thoroughfare, Water Street, past dozens of somewhat touristy shops and restaurants.

Close by you will find the Blue Horizon, a contemporary Vancouver hotel with an indoor pool, a sauna and corner guest rooms with a full balcony. Just 2 minutes’ walk from the seawall, adjacent to False Creek and English Bay, is the wine-themed hotel Executive Hotel Vintage Park.

Just a few blocks from Davie Village you’ll find Yaletown, where Vancouver’s fine-arts-and-fashion elite have converted dozens of early 20th-century warehouses into chic restaurants, galleries, and shops (including the stellar gourmet food market, Urban Fare, an excellent place to pick up picnic supplies).

This hip district is also home to the city’s coolest hotel, the Opus, which also happens to be one of North America’s most gay-friendly addresses. This swank yet unpretentious property with 96 rooms and suites is a favorite haunt of visiting celebrities, who appreciate the super-efficient staff, boldly designed rooms, and cool lobby lounge.

Another cool Yaletown address for sophisticated chow and memorable people-watching is Blue Water Cafe, whose specialties include a sampler of four ceviches with salmon, halibut, tuna, and scallops, and a wonderful entree of local sablefish caramelized with soy and sake.

From Yaletown, you can catch a water taxi to Granville Island, once the shipping and processing center for the city’s logging industry, and now yet another successful urban renovation with a mammoth public market and many galleries and artists’ studios.

It’s a 15-minute drive east of the city center to Commercial Drive, a neighborhood that’s been reborn in the past decade as the city’s lesbian hub. Here you’ll find several woman-owned shops, including Womyn’s Ware, the definite source for women’s sex toys, lube, and fetish wear.

Most afternoons and evenings, you’ll see cute dykes passing time at the neighborhood’s several shabby-chic coffeehouses. This is also a great area for affordable, healthful cuisine. Excellent options include Havana, a great source for delicious Latin-infused fare, and Cafe Deux Soleils, a veggie restaurant known for its great weekend brunch and Poetry Slam events

Finally, if you’re looking for some outside fun on a sunny day, make the 20-minute drive to West Vancouver to Wreck Beach, which is right by the campus of the University of British Columbia. Not especially sandy or accessible (you must hike down a steep 100-foot trail), this 7.8 km long clothing-optional beach is North America’s largest.

The south end of Wreck Beach (to get there follow the signs for trail number 6) is predominantly gay, and depending on your vantage point, the views from this secluded swath of sand can be amazing, whether you’re admiring nature – or naturists.